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COMPARATIVE BIOGRAPHY

Things Other People Accomplished When They Were Your Age
Enter an age and see a list of accomplishments performed at that age.

 

SHORT STORIES

Audio book of my stories
New:
"A Dollar for Your Soul" and "The Vision Vine" have just been released as an audio book, available at http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/EarlVickers and soon available on iTunes.

"A Dollar for Your Soul"
A good introduction to Ponzi™ schemes and the madness of crowds. Based on a true story about a high-school soul-selling pyramid scheme, this story originally appeared in Marion Zimmer Bradley's Fantasy Magazine. A Russian translation was done by Andrei Novikov and published in December 1993 in Yesly ("If") magazine, which has been voted Europe's best science fiction magazine. Since its circulation in 1993 eclipsed that of MZBFM, it appears that far more people have read this story in a Russian translation I knew nothing about.

"The Vision Vine" Vision Vine illustration
A short story about
virtual reality and entheogens, originally published in Whole Earth Review. It's also about tribal cultures in conflict with modern civilization. The magazine Transdimension Vista published a Japanese translation without my knowledge or permission, so I'm using this graphic without their permission. (Also see Google's translation of the Japanese version back to English.) The story was then translated into Russian (from the English version, of course) and published in the May 2002 issue of Yesly magazine.

"The Talking Cat"
A very short, allegedly true, story.

Boring Bedtime Stories: An Anthology for Insomniacs
A collection of stories designed to be as uninteresting as possible — your contributions are requested.

"The Girl Scout Cookie Project"
What happens when your local scout troop goes on strike and refuses to sell cookies containing trans fatty acids (TFAs)?

"DreamNet"
An unpublished story about dreaming and networks. No one has bothered translating this.

 

INSPIRATIONAL

Paul Hawken's Commencement Address to the Class of 2009
Direct, naked, taut, honest, passionate, lean, shivering, startling, and graceful.

 

POLITICS

You didn't get mad when the Supreme Court stopped a legal recount and appointed a President.

You didn't get mad when Cheney allowed energy company officials to dictate energy policy.

You didn't get mad when a covert CIA operative got outed.

You didn't get mad when the Patriot Act got passed.

You didn't get mad when we illegally invaded a country that posed no threat to us.

You didn't get mad when we spent over 600 billion(and counting) on said illegal war.

You didn't get mad when over 10 billion dollars just disappeared in Iraq.

You didn't get mad when you found out we were torturing people.

You didn't get mad when the government was illegally wiretapping Americans.

You didn't get mad when we didn't catch Bin Laden.

You didn't get mad when you saw the horrible conditions at Walter Reed.

You didn't get mad when we let a major US city, New Orleans, drown.

You didn't get mad when we gave a 900 billion tax break to the rich.

You didn't get mad when the deficit hit the trillion dollar mark.

You finally got mad when the government decided that people in America deserved the right to see a doctor if they are sick.

Yes, illegal wars, lies, corruption, torture, stealing your tax dollars to make the rich richer, are all okay with you, but helping other Americans...oh hell no.
                  — from Nica24

Military Spending by Country
Military Spending by Country
And yet our military budget has to be off-limits!

The Richest 1% Have Looted America's Wealth
What's it going to take to get it back?

AngryTownHall.com
I'm mad as hell about America's socialist fire departments!

Goldman Sachs in Talks to Acquire Treasury Department


Election Watch

A study of the Diebold touch-screen voting system by Princeton University shows that a computer virus can be introduced into one machine and spread to others, undetectably stealing a few votes here, a few votes there.

Read the Princeton study and see the demonstration video

Read the story on Salon.com.


Education Watch

Letter to the Superintendent of Schools
Educating America's future prison inmates

No Child Left Unbored
Destroying the love of learning, one kid at a time

 

CONCEPTUAL ART PROJECTS

The "I Hate My Life" Project

Smiling/Frowning Mona Lisa
This is a hybrid image in which Mona Lisa is smiling when you're up close and frowning when you're far away (or looking at a thumbnail).

The Clockworks Project
An online diary of what I was doing and thinking each time a random timer beeped

Incorporating Dogs into Art

The Dollar Project
I distributed dozens of dollar bills rubber-stamped with messages asking for return of the dollar or information as to its whereabouts

dollar bill with Dollar Project rubber stamp

 

MISCELLANEOUS

Photos of recently discovered Crap Circles, strange circular feces formations.

Crap Circles photo

 

Photos of Fort Ord and the Impossible City

Message Found in a Rat

Belch Beer
So good, you'll want to taste it twice.

 

 

HELP FOR THE ATTITUDINALLY CHALLENGED

Powerful technologies for coping with chronic negativity
Improv, Aikido, meditation, etc.

"You could be happy right now"
Might as well.

 

SCIENCE / NATURE

Jungle recording
My long out-of-print recording "It's a Jungle in There: Sounds of the Tropical Rainforest in 3D" is finally available in .mp3 and AAC formats. You can buy it here or purchase it from the iTunes Store.

Some short essays on tropical bird sounds, along with samples I recorded in Costa Rica.

An essay on Mockingbird Song

Unusual Ideas for Science Fair Projects

Using Information Technology to Save Water
My water district responded to this idea, and the local water district may implement it next year

Environmental Quiz from the "Awesome Possum" video game.
Historical note: I think the bass part of the Awesome Possum theme song was sung by the late Elmer "Len" Dresslar, Jr., famous for being the voice of the Jolly Green Giant.

Do It Like a Penguin
Chapter 7 from Do It Like an Animal: Spice up Your Love Life with Erotic Advice from the Animal Kingdom

A report on Things Found Growing in My House

Concerning the Speed of Light

Quantum Randomness, Consciousness, and the Mind/Body Problem

 

TECHNOLOGY

Turd Polisher ProMake your music shine with Turd Polisher Pro, the ultimate song improvement program! Check out the 'before' and 'after' sound samples.

 

 

 

 

 

 

ChatterBlocker ChatterBlocker is a new software program that uses digital audio technology to neutralize unwanted conversations so you can focus on your work, not your coworkers.

Treadmill MeditationTreadmill Meditation is now available from the iTunes Store.

 

 

 



SFX Machine SFX Machine Pro is an Editor's Choice award-winning sound design and multi-effects plug-in. Now also available in RTAS format for Pro Tools.

 

Purr DetectorThe Purr Detector lighted cat collar glows whenever your cat purrs.

 

 

 

 

The "Credit Card Number Despacing" problem has been solved. This discovery untangles one of computer science's most difficult mysteries.

Masterpiece Helper is a Photoshop plug-in for fixing a variety of common artistic blunders, such as Monet's blurry images and Escher's mistakes with perspective. See all the 5-star awards this program has won!

 

ESSAYS

On Happiness
In which I resolve to just be happy

The Secrets of the Universe
A true story within a true story

The Purpose of a Man
Thoughts on evolutionary biology and love

 

LETTERS

Rejection Letter
from a literary agency

Complaint Letter
to a beard trimmer manufacturer

Reply to a Letter Concerning Post Alpha-Bits
My original was written in crayon

Letter Regarding a Software Upgrade

Reply from a Fast Food Company
regarding those beeping sounds

A Winning TiVo Essay Contest Entry

 

SONGS

A Bunch of Song Demos

A video of tunes written by Earl Vickers and Hal Canon for the Atari Games video game 720°, recently re-recorded by "Metronome the City".


LEGAL

A brief excerpt from a deposition, wherein I give testimony regarding a road kill possum.

 

DREAMS

Near-Lucid Dreams and False Awakenings
Humorous Commentaries on the Human Condition

A hypertext version of a dream about dreaming,
in which a telephone symbolized a dream. The over-reaching interpretation is included at no extra charge

A comic about a dream
about a comic about a dream
Comic about a Dream about a Comic about a Dream

 

THAT OBSCURE OBJECT OF DESIRE

Things people are searching for
Search terms recently used to find this site.

 

MISCELLANEOUS

Domain Names for Sale
Mostly audio-related domain names.

ArtForPersonalGrowth.com
Art for Personal Growth workshops in Silicon Valley.

Zoyart.com
Acrylic, oil and watercolor paintings by Zoya Scholis

 

© 2001-2010, The Sound Guy, Inc.

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